两篇六级作文希望大家帮我改下语法错误advantagesofstudyingabroad和technologyinourlife找了两篇真题写了下有点乱的没有分段将就着看吧,就改语法部分好了可以的话顺便帮忙打下分吧,六级作

Question

两篇六级作文希望大家帮我改下语法错误 advantages of studying abroad 和 technology in our life
找了两篇真题写了下
有点乱的没有分段将就着看吧,就改语法部分好了
可以的话顺便帮忙打下分吧,六级作文的话能及格么
THANKS
第一篇
talk about your opinions on the advantages of studying abroad
nowadays,with the increasing number of studying abroad ,take a look around ,aren’t there any friends of your’s doing it it must be because I do.well I suppose there must be many advantages of it.
In my view,studying abroad can not only enable us to get know to the western culture.But also talk to foreign face to face which can promote our spoken skill.
In the other hand,studying abroad can also open our mind since foreigns are so friendly moreover can expand our horizon from the other country .
So if you have the opportunity,well go for it.it’s better for our age to go outside taking some further studying,it ’s far more advantage than study here.
第二篇
the relationship between technology and our life
With the development of technology ,we can’t deny the convenience it brought us .
Now our life can’t leave without technology.
Take a look around,computers ,TVs,,mobilephones ,vehicle and so on.
It’s hard to image a man can’t do thing without them even for one day.Technology lead us to delight and happiness.now We can stay at home watching tv and knowing what ‘s new in the other country,we can speak to our friends through telephone instead of knocking at their door.There’re plenty benefits it can do.
Nonetheless,it also do some harm.it helps those internet thieves hackers commit crimes as well.With the technology boom,more and more kids becoming addicted in computer games,online surfing.They stop going to school,steal parents money spending all day in internet bars and video game rooms.How awful is it.
In this kind of situation which warn us that we should pay attention to it.We should figure out the limit between the harms and good,do things what is right and what should be doing.

Answer 1

第一篇：
1、nowadays注意首字母大写,其余也是；
2、take a look around放在with the increasing number of studying abroad 前面；
3、aren’t there any friends of your’s doing it ?（不用整的的这么复杂）改为are there any your friends doing that?any在疑问句中就有否定的意思.
4、get know中间加to,或者把get去掉
5、 foreign face to face 改为foreigners……
6、spoken skill改为skills for speaking
7、since foreigns are so friendly moreover can expand our horizon from the other country .foreigns改为foreigners；can前加and
第二篇
1、we can’t deny the convenience it brought us . it改为that
2、TVs把s去掉
3、It’s hard to image a man can’t do thing without them even for one day. can’t do thing 改为can do anything,因为without已经是否定的
4、what ‘s new 改为the news
5、 at their door 改为doors
6、plenty 加of
7、more and more kids becoming addicted becoming 改为become或者are becoming
8、spending 改为and spend
9、 How awful is it改为How awful it is
10、limit改为limitation