请帮忙改一下这段作文.（议论文开头）Inouractualsociety,moreandmoreyoungpeoplechoosetomoveawayfromtheirparentsafterhighschool.MyfriendIrisisoneofthem.Sheis18yearsold,shelivesalonesincelastyear.Assheis

Question

请帮忙改一下这段作文.（议论文开头）
In our actual society,more and more young people choose to move away from their parents after high school.My friend Iris is one of them.She is 18 years old,she lives alone since last year.As she is a college student,she has to study very hard and revise multiple exams.Also,she should do all the house work and take a part-time job to earn her life.She has a lot of pression and she is always drogged-out .Many people believe that moving away from parents is a good way for young people to get in touh with the real life.However,i do not support young people's independent living for two reasons listed:the imporance of college studies and the protect of them from parents.

Answer 1

Nowdays more and more young people perfer to live alone after high school.for example,My friend Iris is one of them.She is 18 years old,and she has been living alone since last year.Now she is a college student,so she has to study very hard in order to pass the exams.Moreover,she has to do the housework after school and take a part-time time job to support herself.Because of these different kinds of pressure,she feels so tired everyday.Many people believe that moving away from parents is a good way for young people to get life experience.However.I do not agree that.Because there are two reasons:one is the protect of them from parents ,the other is the protection their parents offer them .（GOOD POINT 楼主）!