雅思作文批改,如果想要六分的话还有哪些改进之处?Airtravelisonlybenefitrichestpeople.Themajorityofpeoplereceivenoadvantage.Towhatextenddoyouagreeordisagree?Itiscommonforindividualsflytoeverycornerofthe

Question

雅思作文批改,如果想要六分的话还有哪些改进之处?
Air travel is only benefit richest people.The majority of people receive no advantage.To what extend do you agree or disagree?
It is common for individuals fly to every corner of the world by airplanes.Even though some people insist that only richest people can benefit from air travel,I firmly that air travel benefit both richest people and ordinary people .
It is an undeniable fact that air travel costs more than car,train and ship.However,airplanes have its unique superiority like fast and high-level service that other vehicles do not have.Hence,some businessmen or millionaires prefer to take VIP flight and even their private airplane in order to have reduce the time spent in traveling.But it not mean that airplane is unavailable to other people.On the other hand,due to the development of modern airline business and some certain policy support,expenditure of air travel is no longer as high as before ,therefore,the number of air travelers that from the middle class is increasing continuously.For instance,people can choose pay little more money than train tickets to sit in tourist class of the plane.More discounts are available to travelers if they reserve airplane tickets in advance or they are students or armymen with relevant identifications.Furthermore,as the raising of living standard,people have enough disposable income to afford the expense of airplane which means that airplane offer benefits to the majority of people and become a universal vehicle for daily life.
To sum up,the era that air travel is for richest people have pasted away.I feel that airplane is playing great role in common people’s travel because of socio-economic development.

Answer 1

6分的话如果语法问题不大应该可以保证,这里只改语法,不说逻辑、句式和用词啦.It is common for individuals fly to every corner of the world by airplanes.individuals fly语意不清,to后面没有动词,fly和by airpla...